And I’m very sorry to break down one of the most fancy part of the Bible. The good news is that he very likely turned it into beer.
When you read the bible – and trust me this is the most popular book in hotel rooms around the world – you’re not really going through the genuine original masterpiece. You’re reading a translation from a version that has gone through a whole lot of reviews, adaptations and interpretations.
Let’s first look at the map. Jerusalem, Israel,… if we go back 6000BC or so we are in the fertile crescent, in Sumeria, Mesopotamia. This is exactly where the oldest written beer recipe was found, the epic Hymn to Ninkasi (goddess of beer).
Egypt itself was the biggest beer nation in time of the pyramid construction. The builders of Kheops, Khephren and Mykerinos were not slaves, they were proper employees paid in beer (at least in part).
In the most original version of the bible, a popular beverage is often mentioned as Shekar, which means Strong Drink in Hebrew. It was used as a medicine (in time when brewsters knew very well the properties of all plants and herbs, added to the brewing process), and of course for philosophical libations with even some first mentions of responsible consumptions!
“Strong drink” of course leaves a lot of room for interpretation but Shekar derives from Sikaru itself meaning “barley beer” in ancient Semit.
No doubt the beer would have contained honey (as a likely fermentation starter) and fruits, including grapes but the heart of it was grains. “Extreme Beers” somehow (as Dogfish Head would call them).
So how did it become wine in the bible. You need to travel back to the 1600s, the Middle age. Religion was all power. Beer was a popular drink, it was everyone’s drink, affordable, accessible, inclusive. Wine was the opposite: exclusive, prestige and display of wealth. So while the scribes monks wrote the first English translations they turned everyone’s beer into wine (only wine drinkers were educated enough to see the adaptation anyway). If you ever read Asterix and Obelix ( a famous comic) you will know that Romans = Wine and Gauls = Beer. And actually anyone who’s not into Romans (like Jesus) would opt for beer.
Jesus was a beer drinker by all mean. With beard, sandals, long hairs and social skills. Jesus was a hipster
Note that while turning water into beer in one minute is a solid trick (and the best guest to your party) it lacks a lot of the real fun of making beer in 30 days though… !